Dear Black Money – An Open Letter


Dear Black Money

I am your weaker sibling, white. How are you? I am fine here in India and I hope you are enjoying your stay in Switzerland, Panama or whichever heaven you are. I am writing this letter as I have heard that you are coming back to India. Is it true? If it is, then I will suggest you to please reconsider your decision.

Panama Papers Leak - CA Diaries 2016

Black, do you remember the days when we were together and there was no difference between you and me. We were, simply, ‘money’ without any discrimination of black and white. But then some corrupt politicians and cruel businessmen separated us forever. Since that day, you have been growing in numbers and I am left at the mercy of salaried employees who do not have the privilege of you. People often call me No.1, but it’s you who went places- from Mauritius to Dubai to Switzerland to Panama to Hong Kong, while I was locked in FD, Post Office or in PF. While I suffer from high rates of Income Tax, Service Tax, VAT, Property Tax, Entry Tax, you are immune to each one of them.

You will be glad to know that today, there is no piece of land in India, which can be sold or bought without you. Be it Ambanis in Mumbai, Aggarwals in Delhi or Chatterjees in Kolkatta- you connect the country. You have been successful in buying MPs and in the past, have made a special appearance in parliament as well. Credit goes only to you black, that today, even a government peon can become a millionaire. People here won’t accept a girl, even if she is slightest of black, however, when it comes to money, they treat both black and white equally.But, despite all this, please don’t come back from Switzerland.

Black, if you will come back, do not expect to be of any help for poor. You will again be routed at the hands of those special few on the pretext of schemes like MNREGA or Indira Awas Yojna. Instead of the wonderful lockers of Swiss Bank, you will be kept hidden behind the walls, beneath the bed and sometimes, even in the loos. You won’t get the privilege of cheques or credit card. In its place, you will be exchanged on the basis of Rs.10 note. Some smart peoples, who call themselves Chartered Accountants, may also force you to convert into me. But that’s not the worst part.

Imagine yourself inside a BMW standing on a red light. A small kid, handicapped from both legs will be knocking the car, begging for you. Your heart will cry to go into that boy’s hand, but you won’t be able to. Even if, by chance, you succeed, you will be taken up by the mafia of the red light and subsequently thrown back into the lockers of someone else. Next day, you will be in an Audi, and the boy will be at the same red light. You will exchange hands at marriages, on the pretext of dowry. You will be worshiped in the form of Goddess Laxmi and then, will be used to settle the cases of rape, while the girl will commit suicide. It’s you who will be responsible for child trafficking- for all the mental and physical trauma of those sweet little children. People here will use you with such hardheartedness that you will feel ashamed of your existence.

Trust me brother! Don’t come back to India. The hearts of people, here, are blacker than your colour. No matter whatever law they may form, but you must not forget that you are only a ‘chunaavi jumla’.

Your fairer self

White Money (TDS deducted!)

P.S.: Sending you a tube of New Improved Fair n Lovely. You really need one!

CA Diaries

CA Diaries

CA Diaries is India's first independent online magazine for the Chartered Accountants and by the Chartered Accountants; with an objective to bring out the other side of Chartered Accountants, which is way beyond numbers and sections of laws.

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